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Fighting the Vampires of the Sexuality of Death

Sometimes popular myths are truer than people realize.  The popular vampire storyline that has our public in all agog is a case in point.  If you have sex with a vampire you die.  Whatayaknow?  That’s what the Bible’s been saying for 3000 years:  Sex outside of marriage leads to death.  I call it the Sexuality of Death.  I’ve discussed it in other blogs and podcasts, but briefly:

-if a child is molested, the child thinks he’s going to die

-if a lady is raped, she thinks she’s going to die

-if a baby is unwanted he is too often aborted and he dies

-masturbating to porn, a guy’s seed (life, you know) is spilled onto the ground or spilled into a kleenex and flushed down the toilet: death

-the pornography itself: turn off the electricity and it’s gone.  Poof.

-two men expose themselves to excrement, which the body is trying to extricate so you don’t die

-two men or two women can never make life, despite governmental or public sanction.  In our society it doesn’t matter.  As long as you FEEL like you love the person you are doing the rituals of death with.  Feelings become the god of the age.  Still: not life.  Smiles, maybe.  But underneath?

-a man and a woman who are not married, but are cohabiting and pretending to be married.  They have the guise of marriage.  It looks like marriages, but it isn’t.  They are only fooling themselves.  They are posers.  Then they wonder why they have problems.  Then they think I can’t be with a person who’s so selfish, little realizing they themselves are selfish for thinking you can have a marriage without sacrificing yourself and your life and your future and the relationship ends up in death.  Cohabiting couples are more likely to break up, have abortions and sexual abuse, both child and partnership violence and breakups.  They are fraught with conflict, sexual problems (duh?) and money problems.  But see?  We’re smiling, so everything must be Okay.  Little do they know the vampire has struck and they are, in fact, dying.

-BDSM roleplays sacrificial rituals of death that go back at least to the Biblical Canaanites, if not further.  Here: let’s romanticize me taking away your soul with your permission.  See?  Isn’t that fun?  Now let’s dress it up and tout it as the new female erotica.  Who can we seduce now?  Isn’t being manipulated fun?  Let’s make movies about this and seduce our whole society that sex between a husband and wife is boring and we need these things from Ace Hardware to spruce up our love life (Ace Hardware?  What does Ace Hardware have to do with love?).  We just wanna have fun.

Death is fun?

At least in China they do their Sexuality of Death without all the glamour.   Yesterday it was reported Chinese family planning officials forced a woman to abort her daughter when she was seven months pregnant.  Her crime?  She already had a child:

According to reports, Jianmei was beaten and dragged into vehicle on June 2 by family planning officials while her husband, Deng Jiyuan, was at work. Jiyuan told Ling of All Girls Allowed that five men had abducted his wife and taken her to a hospital where they held her down.

“They covered her head with a pillowcase. She couldn’t do anything because they were restraining her,” the husband stated.

The officials asked her to pay fines worth more than $6,000 but when the money wasn’t given, they forced Jianmei to sign an abortion “consent” form. They inked her thumb and pressed it forcibly against the form.

Toxins were then injected into the brain of her unborn daughter.

“I could feel the baby jumping around inside me all the time, but then she went still,” the mother recounted to Ling.

The forced abortion took place on June 3. After enduring painful contractions, she gave birth on June 4 to her deceased child.

Still, occasionally, in our society, the hurt of the Sexuality of Death can be seen.  There’s evidence.  But it’s getting scarcer and rarer.  You can see it in the report of what the 18-year old man testified yesterday day in the Penn State Jerry Sandusky child abuse scandal.  CBS reported:

“I spaced,” the alleged victim said. “I didn’t know what to do with all the thoughts running through my head, I just kind of blacked out and didn’t want it to happen. I froze.”

He testified that after he broke off contact with Sandusky, the former coach came to his home and yelled at him for not spending more time with him. He told the court that the argument got heated and that eventually hid behind a bush to avoid Sandusky.

“I got extremely, extremely scared,” testified the man. “With all the connections he had if he really thought I would say what happened that he could hurt me or someone close to me.”

Hid behind a bush?  Good for him.  At least someone is getting it.

-Your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to move in with you?  Run away.

-A same-sex friend want’s to do what?  Run away.

-The porn vampires come out at night and say “click here,”  “click here.”  Run away.

-Your partner wants to tie you up?  Are you kidding me?  Tie me up?  And then he’s showing you porn pictures of happy women with dog collars around their necks and says, see all the happy faces?  Run.  Run away.

Somehow in our culture we still identify child abuse as something sick and dirty and wrong and hurtful and deserving of punishment so that we do not promote it in the public sphere.  But everywhere else, the Sexuality of Death is just fine.

This day, chose life, the Bible says, over and over. But no.  We like our death, all dressed up, with celebratory parades and dances and loud, pulsing music, and beautiful gowns and bodies and grinning faces, ear to ear on the celebrity pages giving the pretense of life, but imposters all.

We don’t like our Christians pointing these things out.  You can be a Christian as long as you smile and either keep your mouth shut or agree that indeed, death is to be preferred to life.  Christians are judgmental, you know.  You don’t want mommy or daddy telling you to not put your hand on the stove or to drink that poison.  So let’s shut them up.  Eventually it’ll be lock them up.  See how tolerant we are?  Or we could throw them to the lions like the Roman’s did.  At least get some entertainment out of the deal.

Rome: Hey, there’s a society steeped in death.  We’ve been down this road before?


Dr. Bing has commented on the Sexuality of Death before.  You can see the list here.


Dr. Bing Wall is a therapist specializing in marriage and relationships and issues facing single adults with a practice in Ames and Urbandale, Iowa.  To set up a time to see Dr. Wall click here or call 888-233-8473.  For more information about Dr. Wall click here.

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